Shame
Loneliness
Despair
Lust
Futility
Apathy
Ambition
Whether it’s instances such as finding purposeful work, deepening relationships with others, or drawing closer to God; those moments are awesome and help to keep us going. From what I’ve seen in my own personal life though, the devil wants to rob us of the joy of those times so despair can creep into our hearts.
When I encounter despair trying to worm its way into my life uninvited, I am reminded of Elijah. The man had just witnessed fire come down from heaven in an answer to his prayer (I Kings 18:38). Talk about a mountaintop experience! Twelve verses later, Elijah is giving up and asking God to end his life (I Kings 19:4). Elijah had fallen into despair.
The lie of despair says, “There is nothing really worth living for.” The Truth is that your hope is secure in Jesus (Hebrews 6:17-19).
Knowing the journey ahead of Elijah would be strenuous, God sent an angel to feed and strengthen him (I Kings 19:5-8). God did not lose track of what Elijah was going through, and He will not lose you or me in the shuffle either. The road you are facing may be difficult, but Christ is offering the hope and sustenance you need to continue.
Lord, I pray for those who are battling despair. I ask You to encourage and strengthen them just as You did with Elijah and reveal to them that the hope of Jesus is a solid anchor to weather the storms of life. I pray that they do not believe the lies of the enemy but are reminded of their purpose and worth in Your kingdom, Father. Amen.
There is nothing really worth living for
your hope is secure in jesus
reed hoeness
As a man, it’s very easy to feel uncomfortable, even unnatural, to be open, genuine, vulnerable, ask for help, ask for prayer, admit I don’t have all the answers; to allow myself to trust another not to laugh, minimize or trivialize my struggles and challenges.
I experienced loneliness first hand when my wife Joy died in December of 2021. I know what it’s like to not want to get out of bed, to not want to leave home or be around people. To not feel like I belong or that I don’t fit in. But I am blessed to have friends in our small group and family who were willing to speak truth in love into me. Who reminded me that we are all members of the body of Christ, the church and that our Lord has a place and purpose for each of us and that I needed to show up.
Our enemy, the devil is his name, is a liar and the father of lies and I believe he wants me, us, to live in isolation, despair and depression. Wants me, us, to turn away from our Lord and His body, the church; wants to push and entice me, us, into addiction, immorality, debauchery, anger, resentment and the like.
But our bible tells us, early in Genesis, that “it is not good for man to be alone”. This is in reference to marriage and family, but out Lord gives each of us a “church family”
I believe it’s up to us to step out of our comfort and convenience; get out of bed, get moving, show up, step into a group of some sort, small group, men’s group, find 2,3 or 4 other men to huddle up with on a regular basis in a setting where we can be open and genuine, share our struggles and ask for prayer and accountability. Possibly a discipleship group of 3 to 4 guys.
I also believe it’s up to me, us, to step out of our comfort and convenience to connect with someone we know who may just need a friend who cares enough to listen, to just show up, to speak a blessing, a word of encouragement, to just be a good neighbor.
As a believer we are each members of the church, which is the body of Christ. When one of us hurts or is missing, the whole body suffers.
Lord, help us to keep our hearts and minds focused on knowing and serving you by being sensitive and aware of our need for fellowship and community, by asking for help when we need it and stepping into relationships when we are aware of others who may be fighting isolation and loneliness. Amen.
Loneliness is part of being a man
Friendship is a superpower
jim davis
Most often, I sense shame after I keep doing things I regret or fail to do what I said I would. As a man, you may sense shame after lusting again, not performing at work as expected, or when you let your kids or spouse down once again. Ever been there? I know I have - many times.
Something that was helpful for me was realizing that shame is different than guilt because guilt is the sense that I have done something wrong. But shame is the sense that there is fundamentally something wrong with me. Nobody likes the pressure of shame, and our tendency is to hide, deflect, distract - do anything to escape the feeling that we're unworthy, ugly, or bad. We use gaming, sports, hobbies, entertainment to drown out the ways we don’t like ourselves. Shame keeps us stuck by trying to convince us that we're alone in our struggle and that we need to hide.
The lie of shame says, "I need to do everything possible to prevent people from seeing my failures and weaknesses." But the Truth is that God delights in you, even though you aren't perfect. David realized this when he wrote: “…he rescued me because he delighted in me.” in Psalm 18:19
I know firsthand that the way to remove the pain of shame is not to strive after more religion (rules) and it’s not through distraction to escape it, the solution is to be healed of shame. So my encouragement to you today is to do two things. First, bring your shame to God and ask for healing. Second, expose your shame to other trusted men and receive healing through confession as it says in James 5:16
You are not alone and you're not broken beyond redemption.
Lord, I pray now for those who are battling against shame. Would you remind them as it says in Romans that, …"there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, 2 because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set [them] free from the law of sin and death." May You help them to find healing by bringing their weaknesses before You and others. Amen.
I need to do everything possible to prevent people from seeing my failures and weaknesses
God delights in you, even though you aren't perfect
Ben Mueller
We experience lust when we we’re struggling, compare ourselves to others or otherwise are feeling “less than”. At those times, we see or think about something and give ourselves to the false claims those things make about their ability to satisfy or relieve.
The biblical definition of lust is an out of balance desire. That applies to anything – food, money, work – the list goes on and on. But we typically think of lust with regard to sex. But ALL these – including sex – were created by God and He says whatever He creates is good.
So, the problem isn’t God’s creation or design – it’s how we handle the things He’s given us and what we look for them to accomplish. When mishandled, God’s good things can become strongholds. And there’s one person who wants us to mishandle these things – Satan – the adversary. As in the garden, he not only wants us to view what God created in a distorted way – but to see God HIMSELF in a distorted way.
The lies of sexual lust are complicated and layered. It typically goes like this:
“There’s something wrong with you.”
“You need to do something to validate yourself or find relief.”
That’s typically followed by an accusation or a question about God. It will be some variation of the lie he said to Adam & Eve, “Did God REALLY say (fill in the blank).”
Once we bite on the lie and act out, it typically ends – until the next time – with “I CAN’T believe you did that… and you claim to be a Christian!?”
Lust is a vicious cycle, and I can tell you the accusations never stop. But the cycle can.
Proverbs 18:1 says, “A person who isolates himself seeks his own desire; he quarrels against sound wisdom.” The sin of lust starts to diminish when we focus on RELATIONSHIP –with God FIRST, then with others. But not “TECHNICAL” relationship, like where you’re TECHNICALLY a student at school because as your name is on file with the registrar. But you haven’t bought the books, rarely attend class, and don’t even remember what time class is!
I’m talking about ACTUAL relationship with God and with others. Where you’re INVOLVED and KNOWN. THAT’S the road to freedom from the stronghold of lust. Here’s the prayer: “Lord, I surrender. I surrender my propensity to accept imitations to find relief or validation. I turn away from THEM – and I turn TO You. Amen.”
I am a slave to my sexual desire
God created me for REAL intimacy, not imitations.
bob larson
Is money bad? No. It is inherently neutral - neither good nor bad. It’s how you use the gift of money that determines its true value. Was it used to advance the Kingdom or to satisfy selfish desires?
Ambition is the same.
I am a naturally ambitious person, and I consider it a gift from God. It’s something he has uniquely gifted me with for a purpose of leading His church. Like all gifts, it is given in stewardship. How am I using what the Lord has given to advance the Kingdom?
Interestingly enough, the word “ambition” doesn’t show up much in the NT. When it does, it almost always has another word in front of it… “SELFISH” (Rom 15:20, Gal 5:20, Phil 1:17, Phil 2:3, James 3:14,16). What happens when we selfishly misuse the gift of ambition?
James 3:14-16
if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.
It leads to disorder and evil. Sharp words from James. But ambition is used one other time, and I love this verse…
Romans 15:20
It has always been my ambition to preach the gospel where Christ was not known
My heart resonates with that! Paul’s ambition was driven by a passion to preach the gospel for which he was called. And so, the ultimate question is… Does your ambition align with God’s purposes?
Before you answer too quickly, you must wrestle with whether or not you have a clear calling from God on your life. Calling fuels passion. Passion drives ambition. What has God called you to do, and is that calling driving your ambition?
Finally, once you grab on to that clear calling, passion and ambition, you realize it defines you. And that’s okay. When your calling aligns with God’s plans and purposes for your life, you become aware that living out that ambition is defining you into His son’s image. Chasing after the Kingdom molds you into a Kingdom person.
However, ambition has a dark side for many men. What happens when selfish ambition defines you, it’s driving you, and you’re living for it? Too many men are defined by worldly measurements such as success, power, wealth, and toys. They are defined on human terms rather than heavenly treasure. As James noted that ambition is “earthly, unspiritual, demonic.”
Are your ambitions aligned with God’s purposes?
If they are aligned with Christ, chase them with all your might. Hold on to that ambition with all you have. Godly ambition is a genuine gift, and the world needs more authentic men chasing after the Kingdom life.
Ambition is fuel for personal success
ambition is a gift for kingdom impact
jason shanks
God sees! Do all your work as if you are doing it for the Lord.
John 10:10 - The Thief comes to kill, steal and destroy; I have come to give you life and it to the full!
Satan wants us to think what we do doesn't matter. Because when he steals our joy or purpose, he is stealing our manhood. The head of the family, father, husband, brother, son you were meant to be. If Satan can do that then he wins. We lose out on the chance to fulfill God’s plan.
Romans 8:18 - Our current sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed.
God sees our hearts; God sees your hurts and frustration's. Your work at a job or being who God needs you to be to someone hurting in not for nothing! It does have meaning! God has a plan. We may not understand it at the time. God does. He can take a truck driver and use him in ways I still don’t know yet!
But I am willing to let God use me and let nothing be meaningless.
Everyone has a purpose! We just have to let God have control so he can use us for his glory! NO matter what we do on this earth! Just like Pastor Jason said in the first lesson. Invest Eternally!
my work doesn't matter
You have a calling to serve and heal the world
jason webb
The place I’ve experienced apathy the most is when I haven’t gotten something I’ve wanted from God. Whether it was impatiently wanting to find the spouse God had for me or wanting God to help my daughter leave the NICU. In these moments, I found it easy to become apathetic and begin caring less about living the Christian life because things weren’t moving quickly enough. Looking back, apathy gave perspective change from trusting God and His timing to becoming temporarily distant from God and irritated with His timing. I became apathetic by becoming numb to anything God was trying to teach me in those moments and threw a pity party instead. I began to neglect alone with Him temporarily also. Maybe you’ve experienced something similar.
If you’re not familiar, apathy is the absence or suppression of passion, emotion, or excitement. It also means lack of interest in or concern for things that others find moving or exciting. So, when I didn’t get what I wanted when I wanted it, I’d temporarily become apathetic to God’s presence and plans in my life, when I’d normally be actively trying to pursue God. It’s almost as if apathy causes a second life that is different than how we’d want to live our life regularly.
My inward frustration would sound something like the lie: There is Nothing Worth Giving Yourself For. But the Truth is: You Were Born to Live a Life of Consequence, meaning God is worth giving our lives to, including time preferences, because even when circumstances get in the way of our desired outcome, God is still working ALL things together for good (Romans 8:28). It’s not easy to trust God is still good, especially when circumstances aren’t enjoyable, but trusting His goodness over becoming apathetic and disinterested in Him, always works out for our good, in the end.
Following these events, God made me aware of my apathetic pattern. When this happened, I repented, and when I’ve not gotten something in my own timing, I attempted to see it as an opportunity to trust His timing instead. I’ve failed at this, but I’ve also had victory with this as a man who is now married, and whose daughter left the NICU and is a happy, healthy baby.
Praise Jesus!
I encourage you today, don’t let anything make you numb to God’s work in your life. A wise man told me, “Choices first, feelings follow.” It’s easy to begin apathetic tendencies and start to care less because life is hard. However, God calls us to live a disciplined life, so we must make the choice to resist this lie and seek the truth instead. I can truthfully say, I’ve always been glad I made this choice, and I know you will too.
Father, I pray against the lie of apathy over everyone under the sound of my voice. Lord, I pray you’d begin to make us aware of when we slip into this lie and strengthen us to overcome the lie with the truth, like Jesus did in the wilderness. It’s not hard to see that the enemy wants us to be numb, apathetic and disinterested in the plans you have for us, God. Keep us from knowingly or unknowingly giving into this bondage. Free us and keep us free like only You can. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
There is nothing worth giving yourself for
you were born to live a life of consequence
Mylon dice
As a man of God…
I will put God first in all things
Take full responsibility for myself and my spiritual growth
Develop my life for the greater good
I will shepherd my family with truth and grace
Loving, protecting, serving, and caring for them
Teaching them to love God with all our hearts
I will steward my finances and contribute to the home
I will be faithful in love and loyal to my friends
Seeking to be a generous man
Trustworthy in all dealings
Treating women with respect
Never tolerating gossip or slander
Always giving my best
I will confront evil, pursue justice, and love mercy
Forgiving those who have wronged me
Seeking reconciliation with those I have wronged
Defending the hurting, lost, and poor
Standing up for those who need a hand
I am committed to living a life that points people to Jesus
Dedicated to mentoring and discipling other men
Honoring God and being faithful to His church
Seeking to obey His Word and do His will.
Reading my Bible and praying regularly
Using my gifts and talents to serve God’s people
Helping to build up Christ’s church
I WILL learn from my mistakes, repent of my sins, and walk with integrity as a man answerable to God.